Metamorphosis- the daily evolution of a young wife

they had it. target had it. the darjeeling limited. with adrien brody, jason schwartzman, and luke wilson. but we didn’t get it =( jeremy forgot the 10% off coupon at home. oh how i cannot wait to watch it. also, i’m still dying to see the royal tenenbaums. 

well, it’s friday! actually, yesterday at work wasn’t that bad. it was a little boring, but i met this great german woman who was pregnant & looking for maternity clothes. i helped her pick some out & we talked for awhile. she was so sweet & had the greatest accent. my one manager (the jury is still out on him because he says “oh my gosh, i love your shirt” in that voice more than anything else) was unusually nice to me yesterday. he let me do a fit session, where we try on clothes, particularly new spring ones so we know how they fit to tell the customer. basically, it’s a way to waste time but it’s still fun & we get paid to do it. so i took 45 minutes to do that, and it was fun, though some of the things i don’t really like. cause they’re wierd. 

i have quite the list of things to do today.  first, i should probably shower. then i’m going to vacuum around the apartment. i was going to clean the entire thing, but my lovely husband cleaned yesterday & did several loads of laundry he’s so sweet & i love him so much. i’ll wait til after dinner tonight to do more dishes. also, i need to take out the trash. after i straighten up around here a bit, i’m planning on going to cranberry to the bank to deposit some checks & then [hopefully] drop a bag of clothes off at bethany’s apartment. 

jeremy suggested that we should read a lot over break. i liked that idea, so i’m going to pick out 2 books that i’m going to attempt to get through while we’re at my house & his. trouble is, i have an entire bookcase of books & i can only pick 2? i need to get moving.  

i love fridays. not because it’s the start of the weekend, but because for some reason, my managers always give me friday off. it’s been this way for the past 5 weeks and i am not arguing or complaining. yesterday i thought it was thursday so i got really excited for it should be friday. but no. today is thursday. i still have to go to work. can i confess something pathetic? 

there’s 4 gap stores in our 1 big store: body, adult, kids, & baby. since september, i worked mostly in kids, with different times in all the other stores. but the majority in kids. i’m alone over there, it’s usually desolate, so i can do pretty much what i want & waste time. lately, i’ve been in adult. that was fun during the first couple days when we got the new spring line in. now, i’ve been over there every day for the past 3 weeks, there’s no new clothes. i don’t have anything to look at & keep me busy. of course there are customers, but not enough to keep me preoccupied. so that’s why i don’t like being in adult. plus, there’s always a manager skulking around the adult store making sure i’m busy (i think they know i don’t do anything in kids) 

also, spring break starts (not for me, but for my husband) on friday. but guess who has to work this weekend? ME! saturday night. which means we can’t start spring break til sunday. it’ll be nice though, we’re going to my house first then jeremy’s. he has a job interview at the car dealership where both his parents work. i’m excited for him, i think he’ll get the job.

i suppose i should start getting ready for work. i had other things on my mind about which to write, but my husband got me acting like a fish and we were having fun on the couch.  

my computer is old, relatively speaking. it’s going on 3 years old, and is a discontinued model of apple laptops. yet, it has served me well through the time she & i have been together. yes, she. her name is nellie. 

however, once freshman year, in march, my computer didn’t shut down correctly (a problem macs have sometimes, that i don’t understand whatsoever) & the next time i started my computer, it was as if i had just pulled the computer out of the box. new background, all my pictures & music were gone…. i later found out that my pictures & music were still there, just in hidden folders.

well guess what happened last week at my house. the same thing.  

i’ve spent the last couple hours tonight trying to get my photos back into iphoto, and of course deleting copies of every picture i ever had on the computer in the first place (because macs crash, but darn it, they make copies of everything!)  i deleted all my music from my computer because it’s all on my ipod, and now proudly have 13 gb to work with. but i’m only using about 5, says my computer. weird. 

so my frustration with apple tonight is exponentially larger than usual. i can’t wait to get an imac. also, what’s with the new apple laptop? it’s thin, that’s cute, but it doesn’t have an  optical slot drive. it has an external one, but who would want to carry that around all day long? gah.

bridges help you get from one place to another, right? i’ve been married for one month & two weeks. it has been busy, yet, i haven’t done much. two weeks after our wedding, jeremy & i visited his parents. a week & a half ago, we went to the symphony. this past weekend, we visited my parents. both of us are working right now, & jeremy is finishing school. thus far, i don’t know that i’ve really felt the full blast of being married, i guess.  yes, i have a husband & an apartment to clean, finances to worry about (jeremy probably worries about them more than i do)  

it feels like we’re waiting for something. and we are- may 17th to roll around so we can move back to the coveted cumberland. where all our problems will go away. this is not true, quite the opposite, in fact. and i want to remember that. so much of our conversation is based upon dreaming of cumberland. don’t get me wrong, i’m very excited to move there… the prospect of jeremy having a full-time, very benefiting job; having a church that we know & love to attend & become involved in; a bigger apartment [duplex, really], family to be around.. it all sounds amazing but sometimes i find myself dreaming of then, and not even stopping to think “what’s going on right now?”  

right now, time is carefully planned out, it is stressful, and busy, and mostly, a whirlwind. but- i love it. i really enjoy coming home from work to an apartment [usually messy] seeing my husband sitting on the couch reading things on the internet. having dinner together & watching the office or talking at night. i would much rather come home to a messy house, tired from work, & still having to make dinner than come home to young east and write papers all night.  bridges transport you to another place, usually thought to be a speedier route, such as over a lake or river or something. sometimes bridges are old and decrepit & not very safe to walk on. sometimes  i feel like i’m on one of those bridges and it’s going to give out beneath me. then what will i do? fall into the river?

i think the bridge (i.e. the time from now til may that we are stuck in beaver falls) is a different kind of bridge. it’s not a better route, because we can’t escape the “long way,” as it were. jeremy has to graduate. being the slow route, it’s teaching us to enjoy each other, the time we have, though hectic. i’ve heard it said that being broke and uber-busy in the first stages of marriage can prepare you to budget better & count time spent together more precious as time goes on. i hope this is the case, then, for jeremy & i. i would very much like to learn to put the things i’m learning now into good practice & use for the future. our bridge is a conglomeration. waiting, anticipating, busy. but also shows love, commitment, and a passion for each other that shouldn’t be taken for granted.